ho-ho-ho-hooooo boi.

ok, so phase one… i have no idea how a blog works, why a blog works, and what to do with a blog once you have it. i think usually they’re supposed to belong to rather interesting people with a certain talent for writing. personally i just have a talent for being entertaining, but the writing aspect… well we’ll both grow tired of it soon, but for some strange reason i am locked and loaded, laser pointed on these cute little writing assignments in which you talk about nothing and for some reason that is appetizing to the human soul.

stage one of my day – work was crap X 2
i haven’t produced any legitimate product since my onslaught of online interview vidz. as a side note, i don’t have a camera to work with anymore as it is and rather question the state of my employment at this tiny company. between you and me, i rather enjoy the work i do. i can’t expect that i would find a better place to pay the bills, but at the end of the day… i just hate work in general. i think a lot of us hate work, but i’m not sold on the idea of doing it forever.

i’ve discovered that i have a rather odd personality when it coems to creating and being imaginative. i can come up with and complete ideas on a very small scheme. but after doing it once, i lose interest very quickly. “that can be done!” i tell myself after finishing a remarkable product, and then i have no interest in doing it a second time around. this encourages a certain creativity, but finds it’s curse in the lack of stability or consistency, or the ability to create a consistent product. whatever. i’m probably just doomed to never do anything ever again.

phase 2 – wednesday is prayer day.
i’m hoping to organize my thoughts and figure out if wednesday is a good day to pray about the rest of my life. i find myself discomforted in this little town i call home, what with the bills being so high, life being so boring and consistent, and there’s little room for adventure. i have enjoyed my season here in nashville, but i’m about to settle down and i’m only 21. that hurts my head and spirits. sure i’m entitled to a certain amount of responsibility and need to respect the relationships and obligations that i have here in nashville, but as each reason or duty slowly dwindles away, i find myself more and more intrigued with the idea of leaving.

it’s not because i hate this town or that i hate any of you, i think it’s simply because it is adventure and who cares if you die rich or if you live poor? the worst that can happen to me, and i fear it every now and then, that i will inevitably end up homeless because my student loan bills are in fact much too steep for the average person and i will never grow comfortable or satisfied with my pay because it will be eaten up by the sallie mae ogres either way. so rather than spending my hard earned life on paying bills to a company that cons people into going into debt, i figure let’s hit rock bottom worst case scenario. let’s be broke and homeless and just move on with it.

geez!

i’m sure i could put a part five and a part four but this would just take all day. i’m on my way to writing a book at this rate. besides, who cares to listen to an old man grumble. not i, no sir, not i.

as a side note – i meant to start writing this in a private blog, but seeing as that it has made its way into the love ewe blog, i’ll just leave it as is.

March 31, 2009. Uncategorized.